Someone has a bone to pick.
bwaahaaahaaahaa! Um, I mean, that’s creepy.
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From: P
Date: Tuesday, April 24, 2007 10:28 AM
I was going to email you today to tell you what “wonderful” gift —
brought us back from his trip. You can’t even imagine how bizarre and gross and inappropriate. Are you ready for this? Ok, so he gives us each a bone. It looks like a small chicken bone, kinda curvy at one end, but definitely a bone. We’re all kind of confused, why is he giving us a bone? and he’s sitting there laughing telling us to guess what kind of bone it is. A chicken leg? No. A Roadrunner leg? No.
Ok, we have no idea. So then — says, to all of us including the new people who don’t realize what a weirdo he is…. “It’s a coon dick”. umm…. excuse me? It’s a what? Apparently racoons have bones in their um, dicks… so — was at a store that sold these (why I don’t know), and saw them and decided that was the ideal gift to bring back to his staff.
Racoon dick bones. I am not even kidding, totally serious, I still can’t believe it. I have it sitting on my filing cabinet because I don’t even know what to do with it. It’s stinky and kind of sticky, and just gross in general. We even looked it up on the internet and it really is a racoon dick bone. Here’s a science lesson for you… did you know racoons, squirrels, foxes, bears, whales, and walruses all have bones in their dicks? I’m pretty sure I could have made it through the end of my life without knowing that, let alone having proof of it on my filing cabinet. — is completely nuts.
What would possess someone to buy that sort of thing, especially for their staff members? I’ll admit it’s the most unique gift I’ve ever received, but also the most disgusting! I promise I’ll never buy anything that weird for you or Sofia! :)
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A lucky girl’s birthday
While it’s still fresh in my mind, I wanted to note this.
This past Sunday was my birthday. I am officially in the last year of my thirtieth decade.
The day before, I was surprised by an unannounced (to me) visit by the Ks. I figured they were coming to lure me out of the cave I’ve holed up in since Sofia came home. I definitely need luring, as I am not currently inclined to venture out. All tapped out.
Well, they HAD come to rescue me. They made a deal with Tim to watch Sofia for the afternoon while he whisked me away for a “grown-up” outing. In return, he will watch Sofia for a day while the Ks whisk me away for a silly girls in LA outing. Wow! I make out like a bandit all the way around!
Tim took me to Stella Mare for brunch. Lovely foood, drinks, and company in the greenhouse. Following that, we headed downtown where he prepared to surprise me with a couple of rented scooters to buzz around… as he put it, “like we did in Hawaii.” (I took that to mean he wanted to help us both capture some aloha, especially by doing something I really enjoyed.)
When we got to the rental place, I saw the price of the scooters and said we should just go back home and get his motorcycle. But then we saw the “Fun Cars”:
How could we resist? As we sped drove off, we could not help but giggle… and keep giggling. It was indeed a FUN car! We awed little kids who stopped in their tracks to watch us putt-putt by. People waved. People smiled. Everyone loved the Fun Car. We then decided to go back home and grab one of the Ks to try it out (see photo). For me, the best part of that was watching KO’ trying to put the helmet on.
I’m so lucky to have such wonderful people in my life.
The next day, my actual birthday, I gloriously got to sleep in until noon. When I awoke, I was greeted by the baking smells of chocolate cake and lemon bread. I had a yummy BLTA (bacon, lettuce, tomato, avocado…with Tillamook sharp cheddar, of course) sandwich for lunch, and Tim made me a delicious pesto tomato pizza (with his homemade crust, of course; I made the pesto earlier that week). I swear it rivaled Zachary’s stuffed pesto pie (from my Berkeley days). The advantage to Tim’s pie is that one didn’t feel like, well, a stuffed pesto pie after eating it.
And it drizzled all day long. My favorite weather.
And a number of friends and family called and sent me cards (KL *made* me a card which she mailed!). And text messages. And an email message from another lifetime… for old times’ sake. And a fun adventure still awaits me with P. (Hopefully, it doesn’t involve another tour of the city’s garbage dump.)
And Sofie smiled lots and lots. She seems to be in a smiling stage the past week. It’s absolutely wonderful and gratifying. She might really like me afterall.
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