Seriously, motherhood is tough–you’re living it–and with the issues that come with a premature baby, it’s twice as tough. Plus, you’re trying to maintain an identity separate from motherhood which piles on the pressure.

You sound to me like you’re doing a great job being yourself while momming. Complaining is allowed and necessary. If I didn’t whine to others when I’m losing it, I might blow up at Grace, and that I don’t want to do.

I’m sorry to hear about how your needs weren’t met when you were wee; you deserved better and you’re giving Sofia better. All I want to do as a parent is make sure Grace isn’t emotionally abandoned ’cause that is a sucky way to grow up, as you and I know.

Keep telling it like it is, Regina. Truth heals. (Fist bump to you, sistah!).

In our culture, it’s a weakness to ask for help. Plus many of us were raised in environments where we didn’t learn to trust so since self-sufficiency is so honored, we chose that coping mechanism to deal with the world.

Here’s my message. We’re ALL going to have to make a personal decision for ourselves that we deserve to ask for help. Foe some of us this means getting in touch with who WE are and starting to love ourselves enough to claim this deserving. Cause here’s the catch. Your child will grow up in a world even more self-sufficient because of technology and security issues.

So take baby steps and reach out to ask and get into practice for when you’ll feel like it’s no big deal - cause you deserve it!!
Peggy Collins